She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
