i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
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