I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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