She said her name was "party"
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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