just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
