i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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