Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
True college students do jello shots in the library
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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