I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Randomize
