I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Randomize
