wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize