Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize
