ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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