CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
