The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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