You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
