Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
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