that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
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