he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
smell my finger.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Randomize