tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
