and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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