i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
