apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
