I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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