i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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