Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
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