piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
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