ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
