she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize