you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize
