I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize