she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
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