As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.