i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
