its not stalking. its research.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
