who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Randomize
