I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
