whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
