Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
