In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
