there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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