so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
