So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
it's not cheating when I paid for it
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
