It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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