dude i'm inner monologue high
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
