I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
No...this little piggys going to the bar
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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