What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
