puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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