is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Randomize
