So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize
