Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
