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I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
