you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
